From something to nothing

Sentence building has never been this hard, nowadays things aren't really the way I wanted them to be, it's hard to describe the feeling of loosing everything. I can recall those times and moments when I had it all, and now I've nothing.

So much have changed, the saga continues is what most people would say, but where does the saga begin, and where's the end?; there's no alignment in my life right now, of ten stated goals, I fulfill none. And that's not crazy talk, I used to fulfill ten of ten, and now I lack the ability, the motivation, the proccess-knowledge. .

I used to tell myself that the key to everything is the ability to connect the dots, I have all the dots infront of me but where's the red thread?.

So many questions so few answers; and the lack of answers is killing me, where will I be tomorrow?, and the day after?.

The questioning continues.

Today is my dad's birthday; Happy birthday dad!

Trading Day!

Yesterday I bought Eurocine Vaccines for 39SEK/share and sold it today for 48SEK/share quite a good day, lets see what tomorrow will bring.

thank you and good night.

Goals: September 07

My goals for september 07

1. Terminate my account at Loopia - accomplished
2. Check out the Club in Mölndal - still in process
3. Apply for alcohol permit - still in process
4. Pass on the report which is due september 14th - accomplished
5. Get the webdesigner to work on the website for the clothing company - still in process
6. Retain information / pictures from the recordlabel - accomplished
7. Get the graphic designer to work on the posters - accomplished
8. Retain business information from Omar - still in process
9. Finish the business modell for the club + business analysis - accomplished
10. Material purchase for the clothing company - accomplished
11. Attain material from Lindome library - accomplished
12. Purchase the book: Den nya ekonomistyrningen - accomplished
13. Get hold on some investors for Omar - still in process
14. Clothing Company: Pre-Production - still in process

Quote

"You can lose a lot of money chasing women but, you will never lose women chasing money"

-Mr. Landis (Edward Herrmann) in the movie: I Think I love My Wife

A good day

Finally has everything come to an end. Seriously I dont know what I've been up to. It all appeared so clearly; It's time for me to make a change, I have to step my game up.

So I called her up and told her that the job didnt suite me, not inspiring enough. It feels so good to have that off my chest, nagging me for a long time, she used to call me every day wanting me to work.

I have done a list of stuff that I have to face, back on track.
this can turn up to be a good day.

Prepared?

• Schedule your study time. If you have a school agenda, make use of it, because they can save your life (or at least your time).
  
  
• Study in one hour or half hour blocks, and for every hour you study, take a 15 minute break. If you study for longer periods of time, you will reduce your ability to retain what your learning.
  
  
• Try as hard as you can not to let everyone get to you. Anxiety and stress are contagious. If everyone around you is freaking out, during your lunch break, or after school, take a walk to recalibrate your zen. The more stressed you are, the less you'll be able to concentrate and learn.
  
  
• Knowing how to study is often the killer for some people. Your particular skill set will probably determine how you study best. if you're verbal linguistic, ask someone if you can teach them what you've learned. This is especially helpful if they know more than you on the topic so that they can correct you if you get something wrong. If you are visual spatial, try drawing what you need to know, so you can remember it.
  
  
• Pretty much every learning style can learn through association or by using abbreviations. For example, the colours of the rainbow are ROY G BIV. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.
  
  
• Practise what you're learning without your notes. Remember that you won't have them during the exam, so you'll need to make sure you know it like the back of your hand.
  
  
• Study groups can be a great way to learn, because everyone has different things that they're good at, so you can all contribute particular areas of knowledge.
  
  
• Star studying early, and avoid cramming at all costs. The night before an exam is the absolute worst time to try to study anything. Your stress level will cause your ability to retain information to plummet. It is however, a great time to review, because if you really know what you've studied, you're just refreshing your mind.
  
  
• Get adequate sleep. The occasional cup of coffee or pop is harmless (everything in moderation). But overdoing it will get you nowhere, and it's quite dangerous. Plus you'll probably give yourself the jitters, and you won't be able to sleep, even when you want to. Take it from someone who's been there.
  
  
• If you must cram, only try to learn key concepts instead of details, which you won't be able to do. But like I said, avoid cramming.
  
  
• Eat healthy. You should be doing this anyway, but make a point of it around exams. The healthier you are, the more effectively you can accomplish things.
  
  
• SMILE! Even if you don't want to, tell a cheesy joke and smile. It will at least give you a reason to be happy for a little bit.

Management accounting

I have gone back to school again, this time I'm attending Business administration A - Management accounting (d) 15 ECTS credits at the university of kalmar ( Handelshögskolan BBS ) which is a lot of fun. I'm actually chasing course literature and it's more than 10 books, luckily I have an income otherwise I would never afford with the amount the student loan provides. I mean 7.500SEK which is barely 1102USD with current rate (1USD = 6.80SEK).

I have a report wich is due september 14th and it's worth 5 points. The course contains of 4 assignments, worth 20 points in total and final exam is worth 80 points. If I generate above 80 points in total I'll earn a VG ( seen as above average ) in my grades. That's my motivator the highest grade: VG

There's so much to do in such a sort time, I missed the rally in Aspiro ( Stock ), I could have earned at least 4.000SEK ( 588USD ) but the other stocks in my portfolio are doing quite well, havn't spent much time analysing the stockmarket at least not the way I used to. The fun part about Aspiro is that I was really out there talking positive about the stock and recommending it to everbody, telling them about how the stock will change the down goin trend, telling them to purchase and gave them what I call a mind-blowing analysis, but unfortunate I never bought any stocks. But there will always be a new trend and I'll set my mind to make a deal, I may have lost an opportunity but there will be another one.

My mind is somewhere else trying to figure out what to do, I have reached an obstacle. I've so much to do and dont know where to begin, and I'm so lazy, never felt the way I feel. Nathalie have been really supportive. Thank you Nathalie, appreciate and I love you.

I have to, I have to, I have to.. there's to many I have to in my life right now.

Still nothing

Oh lets see if I'll manage to write anything today. Have had writer's block for quite some time now.

overall content and structure of the course HRM
Week Module Topic Submission of assignment
24 1 Presentation of yourself 17th of June
24 1 Introduction to Human Resource Management 17th of June
25 2 Strategic Human Resource Management 24th of June
26 3 Organisational behaviour 1st of July
27 4 Performance Management 8th of July
28 5 Planning 15th of July
28 5 Recruitment and Selection 15th of July
29 6 Development, training, investment 22nd of July
30 7 Team management 29th of June
31 8 Reward 5th of August
32 9 International Perspective 12th of August
33 10 Final examination 19th of August

Deal

I was about to close a deal of 200.000 SEK when my boss called me in and we hade to close the office, luckely for me, my client want to take a further look on thursday. Hopefully I'll be trading for him by the end of this week.

Emil met a potential client who wants to invest between 500.000 SEK up to 1 000.000 SEK, not bad. Another broker made a trade of 90.000 SEK in less than 10minutes, not bad at all.

Tomorrow I'll revise following economic indications:

* US Non Farm Payroll report

Of all the world monthly economic reports that can move the currency market, this is it! The monthly US Non Farm Payroll report. This report is the most highly anticipated report each month that can have the most dramatic impact on the markets. The employment data gives the most comprehensive report on how many people are looking for jobs, how many have them, what they are getting paid and how many hours they are working. These numbers are the best way to gauge the current state as well as the future direction of the US economy. The employment numbers are used as another tools by the Federal Reserve in shaping their interest rate policies. The health of the US economy and US interest rates translates to the strength or weakness of the US dollar.

* ISM, Services and non-services
* Empire State
* Michigan consumer sentiment
* Germany, ZEW
* Germany, IFO
* Sweden, Industrial Production
* Japan, TANKAN
* US, PCE
* US, Retail Sales
* UK, CIPS, Services
* Japan, Leading Indicators
* US Wholesale Inventories
* Japan, Core machinery orders
* Eurozone, PMI
* Norway, PPI and CPI
* Beige Book
* US, Unit Labor costs
* UK, Halifax house prices
* Germany, Factory orders.

I'll also be looking at:

* Growth Currencies
* High Yielding Currencies
* Funding Currencies
* Safe Haven Currencies
* Emerging Markets Currencies
* Deficit Currencies
* Surplus Currencies
* Commodity Currencies

I'll soon receive new books, great :

Business Intelligence A Managerial Approach
Business Intelligence Competency Centers
Business Intelligence Roadmap,
The Complete Project Lifecycle for Decision-Support Applications
Managing the information technology resource
Den uppmärksamma organisationen. Från Business Intelligence till Intelligent Business.
Beslutsmodeller i praktisk tillämpning


I'll conclude todays entry by: I love micro & macro economy.

First day

Let me sum up the day.
We did a lot of analysis based on economic indications, and tomorrow I have to openly show my calculations of the american economy, which will be a lot of fun.
Tomorrow we will be looking at the cause and effect on why things work the way they are and also have a case study on the european economy, fun fun.

that's it for now.

Time is tick tacking, I'm still in bed. The phone rings, I'm to damn tired to answer, the alarm goes on but I wont stop it from ringin to tired for that. Mia is not responding, she's in deep sleep.
Time to get up, the first thing I do in the morning is to check the computer, I watch my forex portfolio, still looking good, the stock market is not open yet, great this will save me some time.
I play shortly with my cats; Diva and Lillen.
I'm standing on the balkony it's quite bright outside, the sun is not up yet. Further away I see a father with his child, I stand still looking at them, wondering.

I wonder how their day will be like, I wonder how much the father earns per month, I see it like this if you have children you gotta be sitting on something because the margins have to differ. income vs costs right?.

I wonder if he have some stocks, bonds or maybe he purchase forex, who knows maybe he have his own business or maybe.. I dont know, whatever he's into I gotta know how much he prosper from it, do I have the potential to invest some?.
Mia is up.. good morning beautiful, the love of my life.
She's in the shower, I'm standing still in the hallway faced down, thinking "more money, more more", it's a disease called greed, I'm loving it.
five minutes later I'm sitting infront of the computer and I'm not doing anything special just thinking of how I can advance, their's so many people in my surrounding, what do they do?.
I need to call them all and ask them how they're doing, and maybe if I'm "lucky" I may strike one or two..

nah! I dont know, I mean most of them are my friends.. not friends friends but you know what I mean, I may gain something useful I mean it's not personal it's business.

*updating* work in progress.

According the administation at the university I should have recieved a syllabus and registration info about the business intelligent class but noo.. still nothing.
Man what are they really doing overthere?.

I've tons of stuff to do but I barely have time for anything right now, plenty to do at work, at the office, in school, personal stuff, family matters and friends who have their birthday's coming up and last but not least graduations.

"complain, complain".. not good for my law of attraction.

We are re-organizing the business, the office, we have a new game plan and it sure smells good.
More info to come, but dont think it will be useful info.

Johan's birthday today and we'll celebrate his birthday by having a small trip to Denmark and hopefully do some crazy stuff.

Good night people!

Strategic Human Resource Management

It sounds good doesn't it?

I'm finally done with the registration, I've signed up for Strategic Human Resource Management which is due to start on June 11th. I hope to gaine some strategic knowledge of human resource management, also gain analytical tools which I could use in critical assessment and implementations.

I still have some registrations left to go, but I'll save them for tomorrow, dont worry I'll still be on schedule. So what lays ahead?, major readings and catching up, everything from e24, di.se, affarsvarlden.se from national to international. That's what I do, but what I do best is talk.

the last part came from a senior stockbroker who told me I was made for the job because the way I persuade people and the ability to find winning trends. Recruitment at the office was made through some tests, based on finding trends, analytical technics and the ability to sell.

When I got accepted to College in the state I jumped full of joy, and now I'm something I've allways wanted and I'm not even smiling, strange. Could you tell me what actually differs?.
If you have encountered similar situation please get back at me, an acceptable smiling from the inside should be enough.



P.S I'm happy

oh man, the last few days have been great, I mean really great. I have had the time to recuperate myself and actually spend more time with Mia, which she appreciates.

I have been outside, talking long walks..

Not the size of the dog, it's the size of the fight

Now everything changed for the second time, like the wind changing direction, I'm cold and naked again".one once said "what counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog" which will determine the winner, but the last few years hasn't been good at all, I have lost most of my fights. just a few years ago I was hungry as ever, business was thriving, I was creating major networks and the competition was none.

I never left any survivors, but somehow everything changed, I changed.I'm no longer satisfied, I give up to easy, it's like all I need to do is to reach my goal, and for some reason I just toss everything away, and I have questioned myself several times, if I really was in the right field, is my workplace inspiring enough to motivate me to gain further goals?. I've been quite depressed to be honest, It's like something is missing, I'm moving forward but I still have the wrong name on my door. (if you get the picture).Nothing has been as it used to be, it's like my surroundings are moving way to slow to get me in the mood of fight, Sweden in general, it's like the people in the outskirts of town are slow minded, I'm not complaining or something, I'm not trying to irritate or tease nobody, but maybe I'm still adapted to the americans, and the way they work..

becasuse it seems like the americans seek the best way to become more competitive and make business thrive and escalate to a whole different level.I decided to take a long vacation from everybody and just focuse on being me, recover my strenght to go back in the fight, I was gone for a few months then got back again, but I gave up even before the fight even got started.And now I'm back again, but this time things are different, my team is stronger and we've made major change in our strategi and our work capacity is so much better.A friend of mine said reason to my behavior wasn't lack of knowledge, I just wasn't mentaly ready for a fight, and for somehow people fail, everybody will fail, it's in our nature to fail and to gain something from the loss.because it's no the size of the dog that matters it's the fight in the dog, that will detemine a winner.

Save tonight

Bare with me, as we all go through moments of clarity, while some people struggles with defining themselves and other struggles with keeping their feets down, we sometimes tend to miss the beauty of living, but the only thing we need to know is that the world tend to unfold itself, sooner or later.so save it tonight because today we dont need to fight to break the dawn, because tomorrow we may all be gone, all we need is you and me and a bottle of wine, the reason is that for a moment we all can stop what we are doing or plan to do, we sometimes need to think about ourself, because success is what we need in life, and that is to be strong enough to look back without loosing our own history.I devour life more than ever because of the fear that tomorrow may come and take me away. dont let your ego get carried away.. save your life, your love, your dreams and save a day for peace because we are saving tonight for the beauty of life.

A fading history!

In Breif. Just like you, I take a second to just view you from a distance, my feet doesn’t stop moving, because what I see is just a reflection of a different life, our conversations, smiles, friendship, relationship, or whatever is just a reflection of me and you, a fading history!.